Putting the Pieces of Therapy Together
Empathy - a common misconception is that it means you're putting yourself in another person's shoes but in actuality, it's about being the other person in their actual shoes. In other words, when a patient comes in with a situation, it is the therapist's job to figure out how that situation is making them feel and figure out how that emotion could have stemmed from such a situation. Since human beings all experience different emotions it is not always easy to determine what emotion a certain situation might provoke from someone or understand why. Some situations may make it easier for a therapist or even an outsider to understand why a person may be experiencing a certain emotion. However it is important to keep in mind that even for a therapist it may be challenging to understand how emotions come to be. The initial stages for a therapist are to determine the nature of the emotions and then create an action plan based on that information.
Creating an action plan should be based on reframing the situation in such a way that the client is able to feel grounded about the outcome of the identified area of conflict. A useful way for a therapist to approach this process would be to use the skills of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and integrate various coping strategies. In essence, if the situation can be viewed in a different light for the client, which reduces irrational beliefs that lead to unwanted feelings and emotions, then we can see a shift in the client's behavior and a change in feeling.
One possible tool that can be used would be a CBT thought record so that the client can begin to dispute his/her irrational belief by using concrete data and evidence. It is the responsibility of the therapist to guide the patient in the reframing process and allow their client to begin reframing independently. Often during times of conflict, situations seem to have only one angle for the person dealing with them. This is why it is difficult for people to shift their viewpoints. We get stuck in this "tunnel vision" which causes us in turn, to become stuck in our feelings and repeat the same maladaptive behaviors. When this happens we turn over our power and allow our emotions to push us around. It is important for humans to be in charge of their emotions in order to feel a sense of groundedness.
It is also important to instill a sense of awareness within our clients so they begin to recognize when their emotions are beginning to push them around. Becoming aware of the things that trigger our emotions is a good first step. Using a mood thermometer can help clients gauge when their temperature is rising and recognize patterns in their moods in order to pick up on what are our triggers. It is also a great segue for the therapist to introduce coping strategies for managing these emotions.
Integrating mindfulness techniques and deep breathing practice can help the patient focus in the moment. Typically, when a person's mind begins to take on irrational thoughts, a flooding of ideas fills the brain, making it very difficult to take rational next steps or exhibit constructive behavior. Therefore if the patient is guided towards acquiring the skill of mindfulness s/he will become more proficient at slowing down, focusing, and planning next steps effectively. In a sense this concept is like practicing a skill over and over until you become better at it. Eventually muscle memory forms and that skill becomes habit forming much in the way a basketball player improves his ability to perform effectively on the court through practice.
Once that point has been reached, it is the therapist's role to empower the client and support the positive changes to help with the maintenance of them. Empathy seems like such a simple concept on the surface but it's quite difficult for many and until the literature is read and researched it is no wonder why people fail to show empathy on a daily basis. In order to be a good social thinker it is very important to think about others, and that is why showing empathy is so important and very much at the root of therapy.
Empathy - a common misconception is that it means you're putting yourself in another person's shoes but in actuality, it's about being the other person in their actual shoes. In other words, when a patient comes in with a situation, it is the therapist's job to figure out how that situation is making them feel and figure out how that emotion could have stemmed from such a situation. Since human beings all experience different emotions it is not always easy to determine what emotion a certain situation might provoke from someone or understand why. Some situations may make it easier for a therapist or even an outsider to understand why a person may be experiencing a certain emotion. However it is important to keep in mind that even for a therapist it may be challenging to understand how emotions come to be. The initial stages for a therapist are to determine the nature of the emotions and then create an action plan based on that information.
Creating an action plan should be based on reframing the situation in such a way that the client is able to feel grounded about the outcome of the identified area of conflict. A useful way for a therapist to approach this process would be to use the skills of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and integrate various coping strategies. In essence, if the situation can be viewed in a different light for the client, which reduces irrational beliefs that lead to unwanted feelings and emotions, then we can see a shift in the client's behavior and a change in feeling.
One possible tool that can be used would be a CBT thought record so that the client can begin to dispute his/her irrational belief by using concrete data and evidence. It is the responsibility of the therapist to guide the patient in the reframing process and allow their client to begin reframing independently. Often during times of conflict, situations seem to have only one angle for the person dealing with them. This is why it is difficult for people to shift their viewpoints. We get stuck in this "tunnel vision" which causes us in turn, to become stuck in our feelings and repeat the same maladaptive behaviors. When this happens we turn over our power and allow our emotions to push us around. It is important for humans to be in charge of their emotions in order to feel a sense of groundedness.
It is also important to instill a sense of awareness within our clients so they begin to recognize when their emotions are beginning to push them around. Becoming aware of the things that trigger our emotions is a good first step. Using a mood thermometer can help clients gauge when their temperature is rising and recognize patterns in their moods in order to pick up on what are our triggers. It is also a great segue for the therapist to introduce coping strategies for managing these emotions.
Integrating mindfulness techniques and deep breathing practice can help the patient focus in the moment. Typically, when a person's mind begins to take on irrational thoughts, a flooding of ideas fills the brain, making it very difficult to take rational next steps or exhibit constructive behavior. Therefore if the patient is guided towards acquiring the skill of mindfulness s/he will become more proficient at slowing down, focusing, and planning next steps effectively. In a sense this concept is like practicing a skill over and over until you become better at it. Eventually muscle memory forms and that skill becomes habit forming much in the way a basketball player improves his ability to perform effectively on the court through practice.
Once that point has been reached, it is the therapist's role to empower the client and support the positive changes to help with the maintenance of them. Empathy seems like such a simple concept on the surface but it's quite difficult for many and until the literature is read and researched it is no wonder why people fail to show empathy on a daily basis. In order to be a good social thinker it is very important to think about others, and that is why showing empathy is so important and very much at the root of therapy.